Bridge of Sighs and Waiting for Birdy

I'm playing with fire by writing about books when Tyler has just posted a video about the 8 Crazy Nights. I'm probably going to have to watch The Shining just to make up for it.



This might sound really pessimistic, but I agreed with this reviewer after reading this novel: "Anyone aspiring to be a fiction writer is inclined to give up the dream after reading Russo." Lately I've been reading books and wondering to myself, "How do you get to be that good?" I like to think I'm a pretty good writer, but I'm light years behind these novelists. Not that my dream is be a fiction writer (my creative writing class in college taught me that I can't make up scenarios and that I should stick to creative nonfiction). But HOW do they write like that? It's beyond me.

This book dealt with lots of different commentable themes, but one question that kind of stuck with me is "Is it better to love or be loved?" One character, Sarah, has to choose between two different men; one she has the potential to love passionately, and the other who loves her passionately. One offers her excitement and fiery love, the other offers her lifelong stability. In the end she chooses stability and does love her husband (if in a very peaceful way), all while admitting that some small part of her regrets missing passion.

Now don't read this wrong, Tyler, because we have PLENTY of passion in our life together, but of all the men I've loved, I'm grateful that I chose the one who offered me peace and stability. I was thinking about when Tyler and I chose to get married seven years ago how little we knew each other. Now keep in mind, Tyler and I had known each other for thirteen years at that point. But we still made that decision mostly on faith, trusting that we would have that decision confirmed as we lived together and learned together. And I'm amazed by what a good decision that was. Tyler is hard working and good at his work. He controls his emotions so that he can parent with love. He supports me and my desires, picking up any pieces I drop so that I can live my passions. And all of these qualities give me a peaceful and constant life, the thing I've learned I want most in this life.

I agree with the novel that people have to prioritize their life. Once you make one decision, you automatically sacrifice other choices. But choosing Tyler has never felt like a sacrifice of anything, something I'm grateful to say seven years later.

Is it better to love or be loved? Both.



Now I had a similar reaction to this book. How do you write like that? This book was more depressing, though, because it was a collection of essays that the author Catherine Newman originally wrote like a blog, essentially. This IS what I'd like to do. And I just read it and thought, "Man, she's good."

Motherhood, it's not for the light of heart. But something about it MUST be light, or we'd all run screaming in the street. Sometimes we still run screaming in the street. I really felt Newman understood that when she wrote, "I sleep in a little rowboat. In a thunderstorm, during a war, with cannons going off all night long. And also sharks."