Keepers of the House

This book ended angry.

I've certainly been angry at the end of novels. I've been mad at the characters choices; I've been upset that an author would choose a certain ending. I've even been mad simply because a book ended. But I've never felt the hot fiery fury from the characters themselves that Abigail Howland seeths at the end of Keepers of the House by Shirley Ann Grau.

Maybe it took me by surprise because the rest of the novel seemed so peaceful. Sure, the hypocrisy of segregation was always present in the novel's tension and even fueled the plot at times, but it just seemed a part of the sweltering environment of the South. Sweltering like a day at the pool might be. The heat just seems an accepted variable, but it doesn't seem to motivate anyone to action, it more wears out pool-goers and makes them tired.

Maybe it took me by surprise, because Abigail seemed so composed throughout the rest of the novel, but seems wild with vengeance by the end.

But I think it took me by surprise because most novels wrap themselves up, with the character having learned something, that something bringing them to a more complete and more peaceful state. But Abigail is not peaceful, and I'm not sure what she's learned other than her husband's a jerk and people are not kind. She says, "I know that I shall hurt as much as I have been hurt. I shall destroy as much as I have lost. It's a way to live, you know. It's a way to keep your heart ticking under the sheltering arches of your ribs. And that's enough for now."

How long can someone be fueled by anger? The historian in me wants to say not that long. The girl I was wants to say not that long. My Dad once said that he admired that I could be mad for about two and a half minutes. After that I'm all better. I'm not sure that's true anymore. The older I get the longer I can be angry for. But it always burns itself out.

Maybe I've just never been that mad. Maybe I've never lost that much. I hope I never get acquainted with that kind of fury.